Last week I was lucky enough to have work in my home town. New York City. With the recent passing of Sly Stone, I was reminded of this classic song Hot Fun in the Summer Time. For those of us in NY it was VERY HOT! Total heat wave - 96 degrees in the shade - lyrics from another ‘70’s hit!
Lotta songs written about heat. I appreciated the trip down memory lane, if only to remind me why I left the city for Los Angeles in August of ‘89.
But we take ourselves with us as they say, and I’m still restless in the summer. Lots of unstructured time and for those with little ones and/or elders to care for, in the heat of the summer, it’s not always hot fun. With this in mind, I came up with a few ideas to help!
1. Lower the Bar
A variation on our comedy classic, accepting imperfection. Not every summer day is going to be an outtake from a cinematic montage. Lean into the hot mess, in some cases literally. Not every moment needs to be meaningful. Or structured. Or clothed.
2. Laugh Together
Here’s something most people don’t know. If it’s a parent you’re caring for, and they are having memory issues, people in cognitive decline lose short-term memory but are able to retain emotional memory. That means the feeling of laughter stays, even when the joke itself is gone.
So when all else fails, try some silliness: make a joke, wear a ridiculous hat, let them call you the wrong name if it gets a giggle. And we know this works with kids too. Never underestimate the element of surprise for getting a laugh at any age.
3. The Heat Is Real - and It's a Built-In Excuse
One of the things I miss about not having toddlers and babysitters anymore is the excuse to leave a zero-fun party/barbeque/lecture. Not that I’m not grateful to be invited to places but sometimes…you just want a legit reason to exit. With extreme heat, we have one!
“I don’t know what’s come over me, must be the heat.”
“Clean the piles of paper off my desk? In this heat?”
And, my personal favorite, put cereal and ice cream on the dinner menu.
“Who could cook in this heat?”
And let’s not forget napping. I mean meditation.
4. Find Moments of Joy Where You Can
- Share a cold treat. Ice cream gets to the heart of the matter at any age.
- Watch old comedy clips together. The Carol Burnett Show or cats running into walls, might as well take advantage of our world wide web overlords and ferret out anything that helps us laugh.
- If you’re trying to stay off electronics, certainly one of my summer goals for the family, propose a comedy competition or sorts. Celebrity impressions, Dad jokes, spontaneous made up ghost story. Winner gets, you guessed it, whatever’s left in the freezer.
Despite what an Insta scroll might lead us to believe, summer isn’t all string bikinis, organic under eye concealer with sunscreen and high protein desserts - just me? It can be very challenging to feel responsible for everyone having “FUN!”
In the spirit of the Disney earworm, remember to let the less than perfect moments go! Whether caring for aging parents, burgeoning teens, toddlers or just ourselves, finding one or two moments a day to laugh is the only summer challenge we need to accept!
Find it where you can. Share it when you do. And if the only thing you do today is make someone snort milk trying to dance like Usher, you nailed it.
🍦🧓💬
Want help using humor to connect with aging loved ones (or keep your sanity intact)? Visit Laughter On Call, book a session, or just tell me your weirdest summer caregiving moment. I’ll bring the empathy—and maybe the Jell-O.
